笑住聽...

哇~~~真係好耐都冇寫過Blog啦~有差唔多5個月.主要原因係冇時間,工作忙,番到屋企唔想對住部電腦,、寫中文都好慢. rather type in English coz it's much faster.但係中文始終傳神好多 (coz I am pround of being a local Honger!) 講英文始終都只係"就"吓人咁啦.

好啦..回歸正題. 依幾個月身邊嘅人同事都有唔少嘅改變. 轉咗份新工, stress 少咗但係satisfaction亦少咗.希望可以find a way out to fit into the emptiness... 近排又為咗新屋嘅裝修好忙兼要駛好多$$,搞到户口嘅數目字不斷下降, emptiness又多左,有d悶悶不樂, sigh~~

last Friday去左大酒店,忽然同阿妹稔下自己嘅funeral會係點. 我亦都決定想儀式一切從簡. 佛教儀式係首選,sky blue and white 係主色,同埋好想播住James Blunt 嘅 Good Bye My Lover依首歌. 但係希望親人同朋友笑住聽,俾佢地知道我無憾咁離開,因為在生時有佢地好開心,但我唔hallow...

以下係歌詞, 不妨download聽聽...

"Goodbye My Lover" - James Blunt

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your hand.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

[x2]
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer and when i wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

[x2]
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

I am NOT hallow...

<<雨天>>...

好耐冇寫Blog啦, 成兩個月有多.因為工作實在太忙 (同埋實在太懶, 冇計)

但係啱啱聽完孫燕姿既<<雨天>>, 實在太好聽, 所以一定要post出黎等我以後都可以記得呢首歌....

唔知每個人既雨天有乜嘢唔同呢? 又唔知又有幾多個雨天會被體諒呢?

歌手：孫燕姿 | 作曲：李偉菘
填詞：小寒 | 編曲：Terence Teo

不能忘記的一天, 但人往往是..

 今日係一日我依世人都唔會唔記得既一日, 當年自己啱啱番嚟香港做嘢第一年,對依個世界都仲唔係好了解,以為依個世界只係得兩種人 - "好人"同"壞人".  (當然依家唔會咁稔). 係嗰一年既兩年前, 自己先去完個兩橦樓, 仲記得係夜晚去,係樓下轉緊既鐵波波到向上望..好高好高...過萬著咗燈既玻璃好似兩條銀河咁向上飛插, 不自然咁"哇"咗一聲...真係好靚..仲同埋自己當時好愛既人係個度影咗好多Polaroid.

可惜....不特止d相係番去多倫多時俾人偷哂, 仲有同埋而家我依一世都冇機會再係個度影番一樣咁靚既寶麗來...

人生就係咁妙, 到冇咗既時候先至識"珍惜"..

上年一個人孤伶伶去番同一地方, 同樣"哇"...但係今次發唔到聲. 去到既時候啱啱日落, 個天好靚, 但係唔知點解好冷, 對眼亦唔相信自己所睇到既, 淨係知道大腦不受控制咁叫d淚水滲出嚟遮住對眼, 去叫自己唔好信自己睇到既嘢....................................

不能忘記的一天, 但人往往是... 善忘的....

小天使

突然間好想貼番差唔多十年前係icq既小故事 (估唔到我register咗icq有差唔多十年, 而且都未轉過personal details, hehe):

小天使說祂要走了, 祂說祂的箭再射不入。

我問小天使：「會有射得進的一天嗎？」祂說不知道。

我問小天使要了枝箭 ,祂問我想清楚了沒有。我說：「我本來就什麼都沒有，不是嗎？」

小天使放心不下，回來探我祂問我：「近來好嗎？」

「我和自己談了一次戀愛。」我說。

小天使不明白，我轉過身來給祂看清楚祂留下給我的箭正插著我胸膛，透明的液體從傷口滴出。

「我哭不出來，淚水就從這裏流出了。」我解釋道。「你留給我的箭始終射不入他的心，始終射不入.........」

「傷口會好的。」祂安慰我。我叫小天使不用擔心我。

原來自己細個時稔嘢仲悲過依家, 定係依家已經乜都盲目呢? ...

擔心 と 跌低

擔心 - 自問自己係一個乜嘢都擔心一餐既人, 乜嘢都係係最壞個方面去衡量先.雖然知道咁樣稔係好辛苦自己,但係起碼可以儘量將所有Scenerios稔出黎加以分析, 之不過只係用咗 the most conservative approach去將自己既可承受風險减到最低. 可能因為工作關係, Risk Management 對我黎講係非常之重要,因為見得太多profit 同risk既correlation而再將佢金錢化, 所以知道自己唔擔心既後果會可以去到幾嚴量. "擔心"依兩個字真係形容得好貼切, 個心真係要負擔好多嘢, 好重, 好重. 一個咁多筆劃既"擔"字要放係一個得四劃既"心"字,唔重就假啦~

跌低 - 仰話係自己以前跌得太多,知道跌低有幾痛,所以儘量去避免跌低既可能性, 話者係去學識點樣跌低冇咁痛or跌落一個令到自己冇咁痛既地方. 學柔道都學咗咁多年,師父話永遠最重要既係知道跌低時點樣保護自己,咁先至可以有能力企番起身. 所以話學識點跌係最緊要既, 因為一個淨係識攻擊既人一跌受傷就會俾人K.O. 睇吓"跌低"依兩個字都係有兩大撇向下滑,但係如果冇咗呢兩撇,就會向下墮,可想然知受傷會可以幾嚴重.

再者,唔知自己一生人有幾多次要"跌低", 所以要"擔心".

有時真係好羨慕有d人從未跌低過, 或者係唔會記得跌低有幾痛,又話者係唔識痛而不斷向前衝既人,又又話者根本從未擔心過既人....